Tomorrow is my first day of orientation. Wednesday I start my actual new job.
It feels pretty good to be finished with the last job. I will miss some of the people there, but I’m hoping that the ones that I would miss will keep in touch so I won’t have to miss them. And everything else about that job — Goodbye! I’m outta there. =)
As I was thinking about my employment history over the last couple of weeks, I realized that this will be the first job in a looooong time that isn’t just “until something else comes along”. My first job out of college was an utter disaster and the two jobs since then were just the first thing that was offered to me and I figured, “sure, why not, I’ll do it until I find something better”(nearly 3 years at the first one like that and now nearly 2 at the most recent). Finally, I will be employed doing something that is related to my degree and isn’t something where I feel like I have to explain to everyone why I am doing it. There won’t have to be that little disclaimer at the end of my “where do you work/what do you do” answer. What a relief. I can answer that question with my employer and job title and everyone will say, “oh”, and move on to the next person. *sigh of relief*
Unfortunately, the panic has also set in. I have been having nightmares about all of the things that I must have forgotten in the six years that I have been out of college and sitting in front of a computer screen. Six years! That’s a lot of time to forget things! Logically I understand that they are going to teach me the things that I need to know and that they aren’t going to fire me the first time I don’t understand what they are asking me to do, but logic has done very little to kill the butterflies in my stomach. Deep breathing also hasn’t helped. Computer games keep me distracted for a little while, but the panic is still there just under the surface. Here’s hoping I can shove it a little deeper during the two-day orientation so that when I go in to meet my co-workers on Wednesday I’m not just a quivering mass of freaking-out. =)